My belief in god is at an all time low. My family is the kind that stays veg 3 days a week and goes to temples, we do normal puja at home, whenever someone is going through a bad time astrologically, which seems to be all the time, we play a one hour mantra. Despite all this, we seem to be more or less going through shitty times. I agree we get a break of a year or so but is that enough. What is the point of believing in a higher power, if that power doesn't work. Its kind of like the Indian government, you pay your taxes but when push comes to shove, we don't even have clean roads, majority of Indians are without access to clean water and we don't exactly look at our police with utmost confidence.
There are two instances which come to my mind where I felt I got help -
The first was a gas leak, I was in school and my parents had gone out of town. My sis had gone to work and locked me in the house for safety. I remember I was reading pride and prejudice for the first time ( I have read that book by now more than 20 times and the BBC movie on it, I have seen more than 5 times). I had reached the middle section of the book and it was getting really interesting. Elizabeth was reading the long explanation letter from Darcy and so was I. Suddenly I hear this hizzing sound. Half of me wanted to stay in bed and ignore it and the other half knew that it is a gas leak and I must move. I listen to my first half for a minute and stayed in bed but then the sound got louder and my neighbours below started screaming gas leak gas leak. So I moved my ass and went to the kitchen, it was afternoon time so no lights were on and the kitchen was dark, but I could see that the gas pipe had broken in half and gas was coming out in full force. I automatically panicked, I lost control over my shoulders, they were moving like helicopter blades, atleast it felt like it. I couldnt think, all I wanted to do was call my sister and the gas leak ad on tv which I had seen once, the one issued in public interest kept playing in my head. So I ran (yes back then and in times of peril I do run) opened all the windows and then ran to the corridor which was even darker than the kitchen. my sis had written her boss's number on a sheet of paper and stuck it to the wall, she didn't have a cell then. the paper had ten other numbers also on it. I picked up the receiver of the land-line and looked at the sheet of paper with ten different numbers on it. In the darkness, I could see the boss's number clearly, as there seemed to be a rectangle box of light just on that number. The boss picked it up in one ring and gave it to my sis and the rest is history .... I calmed down and switched the regulator off.
The second was an auto rickshaw, I was in class three and coming back from school in a school bus. My bus-stop had arrived and I had just stepped out and had turned to my right. Before I could even begin walking, an auto came and hit me from the back and i went flying (mind you I was a small thin kid back then!). Two things saved me, the fact i got hit by the auto with my back facing it. The good thing about this was that it hit my school bag. Any other orientation and it would have been trouble. Delhi autos have this metal cutout on the front wheel for decorative purposes and which is as thin as a knife. So thankfully my school bag was between me and the auto. Now comes the really odd part, after the auto hit me I went flying and I swear it felt like I was flying in the air horizontally, with my back facing the ground. As if someone lifted me up. i landed on the ground (eventually) and fell flat on my back, with my school bag again coming between me and the road. I could have fallen face first, but I didn't, I landed on my school bag... not one scratch.
This was written awhile back and my family member who is still unwell, is slightly better now. So I believe a little more.
