Year-end review of God

Firm management: Welcome, please take a seat. I know it's a bit late to do a year-end review, with the new year already, but the firm thought it is a good opportunity to combine the year-end and goal setting for the new year, all together. So lets start with you review shall we.

God: (Smile)

Firm management: So the goal set for you were pretty simple, lets see the first one - change sloth's boss. unfortunately not much progress on that front. It remains the same and if I may add it is getting worse.

God: I am working on it, but it will take sometime for Sloth, you see I am trying to get a permanent solution.

Firm management: That brings us to your second goal, speeding-up completion of projects. God you take too long to make any significant progress. This is a fast paced industry and our clients really dont have much patients.

God: I am trying, but it takes so long for Sloth to get the picture, doesnt matter how many bumps I put there, she doesnt seem to take the right path.

Firm management: This brings us to your third goal, communication. You and Sloth seem to have trouble communicating. You need to be crisp and to the point, you cant keep beating around the bush. This industry is all about getting information and analysis out there in the most clear and precise manner. Our clients have a very short attention span.

God: I need to tell her all the points, she needs to know all her options, before the right one comes her way. Hence I find it hard to be brief and precise, you see God is in the details (smile). I do admit a few mistakes get made in-between but there is a point behind each one of them.

Firm management: This brings us back to your final goal, reducing the number of mistakes. You see we need to stop making mistakes. In this industry there is a very low tolerance for mistakes.

God: But with each mistake, Sloth learns something, otherwise it will be a very long and uneventful life. Plus I always make new ones.

Firm management: yes we know and we need to work on that too!

(Pause for dramatic impact)

Firm management: Let us formulate new goals for you, for 2012.
First: Change Sloth's boss
Second: Let's work on being more efficient on completion of projects, maybe you could improve your communication, lets say instead of sending bad gut feeling before something goes bad, let it not happen. And if you feel Sloth is taking the wrong decision, maybe you could put a billboard up and say "WRONG".
Third: The finish product needs to be client ready, we cant keep double checking everything you do. So maybe you could try to get it right the first time.

God: I will try, I am working very hard, its a process you know. Each time you learn something new and come up with a inbuilt prevention mechanism. And it is important to know what is around the bush, so finally when you find your spot you know its your spot.

Firm management: God this explanation will not fly with any organisation and Sloth is not a person who will let this situation drag on.

God: I will try to work on it. (Gulp)

Funny God's review sounded so much like mine, looks like I am not the only one with a bad boss. Maybe we should give him a chance, as we all expect one. I realize this is a confusing post so wanted to add a clarification - God's boss is me and Firm management is just intermediating and transferring my feedback to God.